Do you feel like a wrecked bag of shit?

Was your workout so brutal, bro, that you can't move your arms to masturbate?  Was your leg day so INTENSE that you don't even wanna bother fucking your girlfriend or boyfriend because hip extensions hurt your quads? Cool story, bro. 

EVERYTHING IS EXTREME

Today I overheard male gymrats talking about how intense their workouts were and how they were so sore from them and so tight and everything.  This doesn't sound productive.  Humans should be able to move freely after they train, just as they did before hand. 

If you don't test your movements, I will show you how you can do this to make smarter choices in a follow up post to this.  But until then, if you think testing sounds like a crock of shit (and if you have not tried it, it does) there are some things you can do to make life easier for you and make faster progress.

Testing sounds akin to homer rubbing food on a surface to see if it will make him fat or not.  Like in cartoon land, testing movements in real life works. 

1. Stop doing shit with your face.  Any tension that you do apply can get redirected and misplaced if you make a shit face. 
2. Don't use excessive tension. Train to lift the weight, not to always stay tight. 
3. Stop when it gets too hard.  Make your movements look easy. 
4. Start feeling better.

Up next, a video on how to do this. 

A month of training

I haven't written my training out in a while.  It has been few and far between, though the PRs come everytime I train still.  The glory now, is that I can train some movements whenever I feel like, since I live in a house with a garage.  All in all, it's far better than living in the apartment I was in.

13 January

Squats- 135x2, 185x2, 205x2, 225x2x2, 245 9m25s 2195lbs

Bench- 135x5, 185x4, 205x3, 225, 225 missed.  7m 2255lbs

Deficit Deadlifts- 135x5, 185x5, 225x3, 275x3, 315, 365* 11m 3230 lbs

Dumbell Rows-100lbs, L/R, 6x5 6m25s 6000lbs moved

18 January

Cambered Bar Squat- 135x3, 185x3, 205x2, 225x3x2 9m25s 2720lbs

Close grip bench- 135x5, 185x4, 205x2, 225, 225.  9m23s 2275lbs

Deficit Deadlifts-185x3, 225x3, 275x3, 315x3, Hooked Grip-365, 365 13m53s 3915lbs

DB rows- 110lbs L/R 10x3, 8m53s 6600lbs

20 Jan

A really hot, pint sized olympic lifter schooled me on how to do cleans properly, so I fucked around for a long time doing doubles and triples with 135.

30 Jan

LCCJ, a pair of fifty pound kettlebells.  5x5, in ten minutes.  2500lbs moved.

1 Feb

Squats-135x4, 155x4, 185x3, 205x2, 225x4x2   3925lbs 13m13s

Bench Press- 135x5, 155x5, 185x3, 205x2, 225, 225 2865lbs in 9m30s

Deadlifts- 225x3, 275x3, 315x2,365 2220lbs in 10m

8 Feb

Squats- 135x3, 185x2, 205x5x3, 3850lbs in 14m.  Had to share the rack with a friend.  Showed him how to test his movements, as well. 

Close grip Bench- 135x5, 155x5, 165x5, 185x4, 185x3.  9m50s 3570lbs moved

One handed deadlifts (on an olympic barbell) L/R 135x5x3 13m15s 4050lbs moved

DB rows- 85lbs L/R 5x5 5m25s 4250lbs moved

9 Feb.

Presses-32kg- L/R 3, 4, 3, 3, 3 5m45s 2240lbs moved

Tactical Pullups, BW is 197 here- 4,3,3,3,3,2 3546lbs moved in 5m20s

Swings 32kg 8x10 L/R in 11m 11200lbs moved

10 Feb

Asymmetric Squats- 135x3, 185x3, 205x2, 225x2, 245 12m8s 2065lbs

Close Grip bench- 135x6, 155x5, 185x3x3 3250lbs in 9m

Jefferson deadlift- 135x4, 185x2, 225, 275x2x1 5m55s 1500lbs

Plate Curls 20lbs L/R-2x5, 3x4, 3x3 1240lbs in 9m30s

BBell Military press-115lbs-4, 4x3 1840lbs in 7m50s

Another asymmetrical lift, my stance was slightly different than this guys.

In other news, I will not be able to enter the competition I intended due to moving, and not having any money as a result.  I will enter one another time, however. 

In the mean time this will suffice to make me somewhat happy. 

The road less traveled.

Here is my latest post, over at Adam T. Glass's website. It surely is a gem, so read it.

Why the hell not?