07 October 2010

Your back hurts? Quit fucking whining and fix it part 2

If you all recall, last time we talked about how having no ass can lead to back problems.

Read it,  and look at the following pictures of Hank Hill for a summary. 

In this episode, Hank had to race his lawn mower, almost couldn't because his back started to hurt, and when he went to the doctor, he got diagnosed with Diminished Gluteal Syndrome and had to wear a fake ass.  

This is a real ass, to contrast with Hank's false orthotic ass. 
One of the other key ingredients to living a life free of back problems is to have a strong waist.  In fitness today, people call it "the core," as if it has some sort of esoteric significance.  Which, it does, but not because it is called the core.  And FYI, training on a goddamn bosu ball is not gonna do jack shit for your core.

Doing crunches will not do anything for your midsection either, and might irritate your back.  So save the pansy shit for your spin class.  If you must lie down, only to raise yourself back up again, do a sit up, with weight, and use your hips, too.   Other options to strengthen your core include:  Walking with a heavy weight, picking a heavy weight up off the ground, holding a heavy weight over your head.  Another viable option is to use an ab wheel, something I enjoy doing and use often.

According to "Intra-abdominal pressure increases stiffness of the lumbar spine" (Read it here)  Intra abdominal pressure increases stiffness in your lumbar spine during heavy lifting.  To translate, if you pressurize your breathing, your spine won't break like a match stick.  And how do you get better at intra abdominal pressure? By activating your core. 

If you try to slap her for useless exercises, a sharp exhalation when you make contact will cause intra abdominal pressure and put tension into your movement, and if your lucky will knock her out.
 Another important aspect of this equation is your breathing.  If you breathe correctly, you should feel your abdominal muscles tighten.  Here's an experiment.  Think of anytime in life you had to lift something heavy, and note that your gut reaction was to hold your breath.  With your breath held properly, you have tension in your diaphragm and this will cause pressure on your abs.  You are "bracing for a punch," as Pavel says.  Pavel also goes in depth with breathing by having you hiss through your teeth--since you are exercising you cannot hold your breath, you have to "breathe behind a shield," and the hissing method accomplishes this.

Breathe behind the shield, comrade.
The best way to think of it is as if you are a house.  Something I have told many people who have started on their strength journey was to imagine a house.  The foundation must hold up a shit ton of weight, so the foundation cannot be weak.  If the foundation is weak,  your house will fall. If you, the human, try to hold up a shit load of weight, and your important areas are lacking, you will fail, meaning you will get injured, or worse, not lift the weight and set a PR.   Any of the above movements I mentioned will train all the areas as a unit, including those areas we touched upon in part one.  In sum:

In heavy lifting, squeeze your ass, pressurize your abs, and lift.  Be it overhead, or off the ground, stay tight and provide a good foundation for your lifting.

Part 1
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5

5 comments:

  1. heavy metal and heavy lifting...i love it

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  2. Thanks man. You and I would get along--we both like Manowar.

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  3. Just found the blog.....

    Well done sir, well done.

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  4. lol while I can't condone knocking out women for simply using a stupid way to exercise I can say your humour definetly made me laugh! Not an easy feat I can assure you!

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